His Will Be Done

This morning I sat down at the computer to write today’s blog post feeling in tune with the subject matter I felt the Lord was giving me. I love writing the most when I know that I am simply being fingers on the keyboard for the Lord because there is so little effort, the words flow and I see them for the first time as they spread across the screen before me. That’s an awesome experience. So, this morning felt like a good writing morning before I even started. God is good!

As I typed out the message I felt the familiar holy tap on my shoulder and, though not actually audible, I heard that this message was one for someone at church. I do not know who but I do know God can even use little ole’ me to get His message to someone or many. I am just thankful He uses me at all. I write a weekly mini-blog-like article for church and knew that meant I must format and condense the message to fit, my only responsibility; the message…His.

It has happened that something I thought I was writing for the church turned into a blog posting and vice versa. I just let it flow until it is done. My Honey asked me how long I made each posting. My answer was not what he was looking for but it was accurate…I write until it’s done. I always know when something is ‘done’ because anything I add on my own rings sour in my ear as I read it. I take away anything that is my contribution and leave the meat and bones of the message from God. Yes, I use my life and family in the examples of life lessons God gives us because that is the way God showed me He could use me most effectively. He showed me this in one giant light bulb moment! Here’s a Reader’s Digest Condensed version of that moment:

Years ago I knew that if I was to be an effective witness for the Lord I needed to step out of my comfort zone and share. I felt inadequate, unskilled, not spiritual enough, not learned enough, you name it! If it was an adjective describing someone not qualified to witness for the Lord…it was me. I had a friend, Katy Brigmon, who along with her husband, Ron, was over the Central Texas Prison Fellowship ministry. My desire to serve Him was urgent and large so I asked Katy if I could tag along sometime to see what prison ministry was all about. She excitedly told me of the coming weekend’s trip to minister in a women’s facility that housed mostly drug offenders and the lessons to be covered were on parenting. As a friend I sought out for prayer, Katy knew things about what I refer to as ‘the hellion years’ I had raising teenage rebellious daughters; surely that would have been enough to make her aware I was not ‘parenting’ teaching material. I remaindered her of this and she smiled saying the ladies would relate to me much better than they ever could with her two kids, big dog, and station wagon driving perfect family image. (My words, not hers) I thought she lost her mind but I agreed to go just to watch. Ha, ha…God’s sense of humor and Katy’s insight threw me in the deep end and I learned a valuable lesson in trusting God over my abilities!

I was assigned my own small group of women to lead through the materials. First, we had to share a bit about ourselves with our group and basically give our testimony of how God worked in our lives. Looking into the faces of these women you could easily see those that were receptive and those that blatantly dared you to try to teach them anything. My life had a lot of good in it but it was also filled with a lot of ugliness, some foisted upon me and some of my own doing. As I shared my personal experiences of all God brought me through in spite of myself, my giant light bulb moment revealed to me in the most profound way how God had turned all the ugliness, heartache and pain I had lived through into something useful and good for reaching these women. They listened to me with open ears and hearts because I had walked in their shoes, knew their pain, felt the abuse, despair and agony of life without Jesus as my Lord. It was one of the few single moments in time that stamp their impression on your heart so deeply you remember every vivid detail and emotion! It was in that moment I saw and believed for the first time that God could and would use me to share my life experiences as a teaching tool to reach others for Him. I have been a willing vessel of his messages ever since.

I have said before I do not share my life to say ‘look at me’ but only to show God-given life lessons are all around us; we need only be receptive to and watching for them. God is in the details, the smallest of moments, the most out-of-the-box situations as well as the grand and obvious. On my living room wall there hangs a pair of wooden shoe stretchers as feet; below them, on the floor, a small leather suitcase. These symbolize our readiness and willingness to go where ever God directs us for His purposes. Between times of marching orders, I will continue to write and share the lessons God gives from daily life. I rarely know if anyone is reading much less being touched by God through what I share but I do know that it is His message going out, not mine. His will be done!