Narrow Path or Wide Road?

I shared before that I write what I write not because I am trying to say, 'I have it all figured out so listen to me' but to simply share the life lessons God allows me see. I believe God is in all things, so I look for Him. I believe God will talk to me through the Holy Spirit, so I listen for Him. I believe this is out there for all Believers but God gave me the task of sharing through writing…so I do.

Jesus was not a teacher/preacher that candy-coated things. He is the epitome of grace and mercy, yet His messages were not watered down to appeal to more people. Let's face it, there are those among us today, like many walking the dusty streets of Biblical times, that do not want to hear they are living wrong. They prefer to hear only the good they can expect when they accept Jesus to the hard-hitting consequences of not following the guidelines He set before us. Friends, to receive the benefits, one must live out the life of a believer as Jesus spelled out in scripture. This cannot be done in a cotton candy faith walk.

At one time prior to and during my Christian infancy, I made the decision that all things Old Testament were obsolete and had no bearing on my faith walk. I was wrong; deadly wrong….eternally not in heaven wrong. Many people believe as I did and I am concerned for them. In Matthew 5:17-20 Jesus says, 'don’t think that I have come to abolish the Torah or the Prophets. I have come not to abolish but to complete. Yes, indeed! I tell you that until heaven and earth have passed away, not so much as a yud (the 10^th and smallest letter in the Hebrew alphabet) or a stroke will pass from the Torah – not until everything that must happen has happened. So whoever disobeys the least of these mitzvoth (command, commandments) and teaches others to do so will be called the least in the Kingdom of heaven. But whoever obeys them and so teaches will be called the great in the Kingdom of heaven. For I tell you that unless your righteousness is far greater than that of the Torah-teachers and P'rushim (religious leaders whose studies focused on what the Torah required of people's lives), you will certainly not enter the Kingdom of Heaven!

There went my whole theory that the Old Testament did not apply anymore. Jesus tied the knot between obeying the teachings and prophesies from the Old Testament to even entering Heaven. Prophesies of the Messiah are all through the O.T. and Jesus, Himself, said he came to fulfill them. So, since you are reading this, it is safe to say 'heaven and earth' has not passed away so we do not get to eliminate anything, not the smallest letter, from the Torah if we plan on getting into heaven.

This begs the question, are we merely following Christian traditions or following Jesus Christ? I ask this because a great many Christians think we are free from the law, Torah, because of Jesus Christ, yet, here we have Him saying this is not so. I think it becomes a slippery slope when we confuse the laws God gave the people with the laws and restrictions the religious leaders imposed on the people. Yes, Jesus did refute the man-made laws and freed us from those. However, the God-given laws were never refuted. In The verses from Matthew above, He says they should not even be messed with. He goes on in the following scriptures to underscore His requirements that are even more stringent than those handed down in Jewish teachings. Not one single sugarcoated statement among them!

Because of Jesus, we are forgiven our sins. We are made righteous through the righteousness of Jesus Christ. These are blessed things we, on our own, can not achieve. It would be a deception and disservice to preach/teach anything other than Jesus and that which He gave us in scripture. As a wise woman once told me, "You cannot pick and choose what you like from the Bible. You either believe it all or you don't.' If we do not share/teach/preach everything from the Bible, that which is easy to live with, that which is hard to follow and the dire consequences thereof, we are NOT teaching the whole of what Jesus came to say and do. I'll ask again, "Are we following Christian tradition or Jesus Christ?"

Hearing God - Part 2

The 2^nd message I spiritually heard was "mansions in heaven'. I told God I really didn't need a mansion in heaven but I sure hoped there would be a garden for me to work. I started pondering the whole concept of mansions in heaven. I stopped long enough to pray and ask God to give me revelation before I researched the subject. Without the benefit of godly revelation, the information is useless to me. Holy Spirit, walk me through this!! If my thinking gets in the way, stop me short. If the information I am reading is not in line with God's word, make that plain to see. I saw a lot that irked my spirit. I want revelation, not irking!

Over the years, I've heard many explanations and descriptions of what mansions in heaven would be like. My questions…why do we need a mansion (as defined in Webster's) to ramble around in all by ourselves? Apparently, everyone is to have his/her own mansion. I once heard a preacher describe how his mansion would be decorated. Why would we need décor when we will be in Heaven? It seems to me Heaven will be more glorious than any décor we could come up with, so this didn't sit well with me. I want to spend as much time as possible in worship and praise, no need for a mansion. Yet, it is in the Bible so there had to be another facet of this I was not seeing. I pushed on. I found an article that landed softly in my soul. It felt on target spiritually. I recently wrote about making sure we seek out the original intent of scripture by knowing how it was written in the original language and the time it was written to better understand it in context without benefit of being watered down over time and versions. This article makes my point. I've included only the information pertinent to mansions in heaven. Perhaps this is on to something.

Jesus said, "In my Father's house are many mansions: if it were not so, I would have told you." (John 14:2) In this scripture, the word "house" in the Greek is "oikia" (pronounced oy-kee'-ah) and means "household" and by extension "family" the word "mansions" is "mone" (pronounced 'mon-ay') and means "residence" (the act or the place).

The meaning of the word "mansions" is "residence" which can either be the place of residence or the act of residence. I've always heard it taught as a place of residence, Christians are always referring to their "mansion in heaven" and the "keys to their mansion." If a mansion by definition is a very large house, how can there be many mansions in a house? There must be another interpretation for this scripture. Perhaps in this case the word "residence" really refers to the act of residence. Are you familiar with the terms, "a doctor in residence" and "a doctor completing his residency?"

Here's some interesting information from the World Book Dictionary. The word "Residence" means - The seat of some power or activity. "Residency" means -The position of a doctor who continues practicing in a hospital after completing his internship. "Resident" means - An official sent to live in a foreign land to represent his country. Interesting, isn't it? If within this context that Jesus made the statement, "In My Father's house there are many mansions," (John 14:2) was He was in fact meaning that, "within the Family or Government of God, there are many official positions of authority?" Many "Residencies" are available!

"I go to prepare a place for you. And if I go and prepare a place for you, I will come again, and receive you unto myself; that where I am, there ye may be also." (John 14:2,3)

The word "place" is translated from the Greek word, "topos" and means "special position" so "to prepare a place" means "to prepare a special position." The word "receive" is "paralambano" and means "to assume an office," the word "unto" is translated from "pros" which means "by the side of" and the phrase "may be" is the Greek word "o" which means "should stand."

So perhaps the verse, "In my Father's house are many mansions: if it were not so, I would have told you. I go to prepare a place for you. And if I go and prepare a place for you, I will come again, and receive you unto myself; that where I am, there ye may be also." can be interpreted, "There are many positions of authority in my Father's Government: If this weren't true I wouldn't say so. I'm leaving to prepare a special place for you now. And if I'm doing this, then I will return and take you with me to stand in that position of authority at my side.

Bear in mind that Jesus made this statement just after one of His ministers (Judas) left to betray Him and consequently abandon his official position. Is Jesus indicating to the rest of His ministers that if they remain faithful to the ministry, for which they were called and selected, at the appointed time He will grant them the right to assume the official offices in which they should stand and for which they have been trained?

Well, that's what I've come up with at this point. This information settles in my spirit but you know me, I want a postcard from Heaven with definitive answers. I'll be waiting and listening for confirmation. It just hit me, if all this is on target, I'll have to find the garden somewhere else.

Hearing God

Tuning your spiritual ears to listen for God is always advisable. I expect God to 'talk' to me, so I listen for it. I've written before about what I call 'the holy tap on the shoulder' when God is making a point with me. This morning I was taking care of my outside business; feeding the wild cats, garden duties, etc when God spoke to me not once but twice in a couple of minute's time about what seemed to be two separate issues.

First, as I put out cat food, I had to chase off a couple of feral male cats that I have not committed to feeding, though they are frequent guest at 'Hacienda Bermea Cat Buffet'. As I chased them off I spiritually heard 'Yes, I tell you that whenever you did these things one of the least important of these brothers of mine, you did them for me!" Cats, God? This applies to cats, too? Really?!

Of course, the verse is out of Matthew 25 and that line comes from the paragraph verses 34-40…..'Then the King will say to those on his right, 'Come, you whom my Father has blessed, take your inheritance, the Kingdom prepared fro you from the founding of the world. For I was hungry and you gave me food, I was thirsty and you gave me something to drink, I was a stranger and you made me your guest, I needed clothes and you provided them, I was sick and you took care of me, I was in prison and you visited me. Then the people who have done what God wants will reply, 'Lord, when did we see you hungry and feed you, or thirsty and give you something to drink? When did we see you sick or in prison, and visit you?' The king will say to them, 'Yes, I tell you that whenever you did these things for one of the least important of these brothers of mine, you did them for me.'

Ok, but does this apply to feeding all the hungry cats that show up? Are we counting animals as 'the least important of these brothers of mine'? We read in Job 12:7-10 when he is responding to his friends(?)….. "But ask the animals – they will teach you - and the birds in the air – they will tell you – or speak to the earth – it will teach you – and the fishes in the sea will inform you: everyone one of them knows that the hand of Adonai has done this! In his hand is the life of every living thing and the spirit of every human being.

I'm sure this could be debated for eons by the various theologians but the key words in theses verse that made my spine tingle was "In his hand is the life of every living thing and the spirit of every human being." If the kitties and my spirit are cradled in the same palm of God, who am I to say they do not count? As hardheaded as I can be sometimes, this verse reverberated within my spirit, and I decided that second guessing God is a path down a rocky road I choose not to travel. I had gladly fed the two cats I wanted to feed but tried to run off any I had not hand picked. Hind-sight being the wonderful tool it is, I looked back at those efforts to run off some of the cats through eyes that just read Matthew 25:40 and felt conviction. In discussing this with my good friend, Mina, she said, "You know, Mimi, I believe God sent them to your door because you and Papa John have a heart for cats. He doesn't send cats to my door. He sends those in need to those that can and will help."

If God did direct them to our door because He knows my Honey and I have a soft spot for them and WOULD feed them, I sure do not want to be the one turning the hungry and thirsty cats away. At this moment in time we have a litter of kittens living under our house born just last Thursday. The momma cat is one I chose to feed because she showed up one day looking very much like a young homeless kitty. She is still very skittish and does not allow us to touch her but we are gaining ground. Today, for the first time, she walked up to my outstretched hand and sniffed my fingers. I was so excited and happy! Silly, isn't it, yet it filled me with joy! ……Hmmm, makes me wonder now why I didn't consider the cats a gift from God rather than pests we spend money on to feed. Through the eyes of God, the situation looks very different! There's a lesson in there, Friends!

You'll have to come back tomorrow to get the other message from God this morning…this ran a bit too long to include the 2^nd message. See you then!

Power to God's People!

As I write this, I am listening to some very relaxing music. No words to pull on the attention of my subconscious, just soothing, relaxing music that seems to sooth the savage beast within. On this Monday morning, after a restful night's sleep, the world and her issues were tugging on my inner peace. I stopped the mental crazies and hopped off the merry-go-round of worldly thoughts on purpose. I determined not to let those peace robbers have any power over my world, my mind and thoughts or my energy. Peace robbers virtually suck the energy right out of you when you go around trying to appease the chaos they insert into your world. You can't win when you play their game. So I choose not to play…..therefore, I win.

I firmly believe we make choices that determine the level of stress in our lives. Before you go listing the things in your world you do not have choices about, let me say there are, indeed, some things we have no control over. However (don't you like the word 'however' better then 'but'?), we can control how we react and respond to those very same issues. As a veteran of stress related wars, both internal and external, I have fallen defeated more times than I care to count when it comes to making the choices that alleviate stress rather than magnifies it. My failures in the stress war have led to the place in my life where I chose to work at doing things differently. I might add here that none of this would be possible was it not for the grace of God and growing of my faith. All by myself, I accomplished nothing. I had to decide I was unable to stand victorious alone. I tried; I failed.

As with stress, other issues become peace robber when we hand power over to them. Let me give a for instance….Halloween. Many Christians believe Halloween is evil and should be banned. At one time, people assigned all sorts of power in their beliefs to the rituals and practices of a particular group of people. If you ask any American child, they will tell you Halloween is just for dressing up in costumes and getting candy. It has no power over them because they have fun associated with the word, not evil rituals. If we planted the seed of evil intent in their hearts, evil thoughts and fears about it would grow. We have a choice to make with our children, do we plant seeds of fear and evil or seeds of fun and candy? Do we give power to evil by breathing life into it or do we buy candy and watch the delighted faces of kids? For me, that's a no-brainer. It is a choice not to give power to anything of an evil nature or superstition.

I am fully aware there are evil sources out there. I believe in the spiritual realm. First, the Bible says so. That alone should be enough. Secondly, as a missionary, I have been to places where people believe all sorts of odd things…odd to me, common to them. In fact, one of the reasons it is easier to minister in 3^rd world countries than in our USA is that they were taught and live by the spiritual realm, so the concept of God and the Holy Spirit living in us when we accept Him is not foreign to them. Our educated populous here want proof they can see or prove in a lab. The spiritual realm is the very core of our Christian faith. We believe God is a spirit being, not flesh made from dirt. We believe the Holy Spirit indwells within us to edify and guide us. We believe Jesus left His place next to God to inhabit a human body so He could deliver the souls of earthly people. To all this, we willingly give power over our lives. It is a choice we make to give power over us.

So, then, does it make sense that, just as we choose to give power to the Trinity, we can choose what we do not give power over us? I think so. Generational curses – you're out of here; no power for you! Peace robbers – hit the road, I have no time or energy to waste on you! Superstitions and fear – you have already been defeated and rendered powerless; read the Bible, you lose!

Yes, my Friends, I believe we have the option to give power and breathe life into a situation or take back the power we have handed over to something other than good and God. Today, I snatched the power back from the energy suckers and focused my thinking and peace…it was a conscious choice. How will you spend your day? How will you distribute the power and energy given by virtue of our standing with God? It's your choice! You live with the consequences of making it either way; like it or not. Might as well make the wisest, most likely to please God choice with positive consequences!

I Am the Clay

Being a walking, talking, active, and effective Christian means you are willing to go through life in living color, outside of the box, coloring outside the lines, wearing red when all others are in beige. Being an effectual Christian is not for sissies or the faint of heart! It's not just Captain James Kirk that boldly goes where no man has gone before! It is the Christian servant willing to lay down his/her life in service of the Lord. It is a life of action, movement forward, striving, and not being satisfied with status quo! There will always be more people to reach for the Lord, always more miles to cover, more languages to bridge, more hearts to touch, more songs to sing for Jesus.

One of my favorite worship songs declares God is the Potter, I am the clay; The Potter's Hand and goes like this:

Beautiful Lord, wonderful savior

I know for sure, all of my days are held in Your hands

Crafted into Your perfect plan

You gently call me, into Your presence

Guiding me by, Your Holy Spirit

Teach me dear Lord To live all of my life through Your eyes

I'm captured by Your Holy calling

Set me apart, I know You're drawing me to Yourself

Lead me Lord I pray

Take me, Mold me Use me, Fill me

I give my life to the Potter's hands

Hold me, Guide me Lead me,

Walk beside me I give my life to the Potter's hand

Whew! Do you see all those action verbs in there? Does not leave a lot of room for inaction and no mention of stagnation, does it? If we are the clay and He is the Potter, doesn't that mean we give up our rights to make and mold ourselves, much less others?Does the clay on the potter's wheel get to determine its shape, final appearance, and job or service for which created?Scary? Maybe. Worth taking the walk on God's terms? OH, YES!

If we look at the numerous varieties of flowers, trees, animals, races of people, and/or colors of skin, we see God has chosen not to make us alike. Life, Friends, is in living color, look around!. No two snowflakes are alike, why should we then think people and ways of serving, praising, worshiping should all be the same? If anything, we should celebrate the differences with hearty enthusiasm. I like the notion that God put as much individual attention in creating me as He did a snowflake! We are unique individuals with different gifts, skills, talents, and callings from and to the same God.

I believe the key point here is that we never lose the willingness to let God mold us and requires we remain open to change. The clay loses its usefulness when it no longer can be molded into the chosen use of the potter. It seems to me the action verbs mentioned in the above song refutes any notion that the life of a Christian is stagnate, lack luster, same old same old thing. It is fluid, molded, filled, captured, set apart, guided, led, and given away. Action, change, and willingness are required of every Christian if we are to remain useful in serving Him. So, Friends, this is why I said," Being a walking, talking, active, and effective Christian means you are willing to go through life in living color, outside of the box, coloring outside the lines, wearing red when all others are in beige. Being an effectual Christian is not for sissies or the faint of heart!" Mold away, Lord, I'm all yours!

Hardhat - check! Pickax - check!

In days gone by, God spoke in many and varied ways to the Fathers through the prophets. But now, in the acharit-hayamin (last days), he has spoken to us through his Son, to who, he has given ownership of everything and through whom he created one universe. This Son is the radiance of the Sh'khinah (God's glory), the very expression of God's essence, upholding all that exists by his powerful word; and after he had, through himself, made purification for sins, he sat down at the right hand of HaG'dulah BaM'roim (the Greatness on High). Hebrews 1:1-3 from (The Complete Jewish Bible) which names the Book of Hebrews 'Messianic Jews'.

In my reading this morning, I found these words to be so beautiful and lyrical. It seemed a concise explanation of the Gospel in the opening of the letters to the Messianic congregations. I've included the original words where written in my Jewish Bible. I feel it is important that we make a point to remember the times, the people, the culture and the intent that scripture was written. The Bible has so many translations and versions. If the Jewish-ness is taken out, we may not be getting the complete intended picture.

The following is a conversation between two of my friends as they prepared for a mission trip to Africa. This really happened as they were shopping for last minutes things for the trip:

Dana – I need to stop and get some thongs.

Debbie – You do not wear thongs!!

Dana – Yes, I do.

Debbie – You've never worn thongs in your life!!

Dana – I've worn thongs all my life!

Debbie – I don't believe it!

Dana – Well, I have. Then I need to buy a CD.

Debbie – What CD are you getting?

Dana – That's none of your business!!

Debbie – What's the big deal? I'm going to be with you, I'll see it.

Dana – No, you will not, it's none of your business.

Debbie – We're about to spend two weeks together and you won't tell me what CD you're buying?

At the time this conversation took place, Dana was in her early fifties and Debbie in her mid-twenties. Their struggle to communicate came from their different perspectives. When Dana said she needed to buy thongs, she as talking about the rubber shoes we used to call thongs now called flip-flops. When Debbie heard the word thongs, she was thinking about the string like underwear that, by the way, Dana really would NEVER wear. Dana planned to purchase a CD at her bank as an investment. To Debbie, the CD meant the little round disc of music. Both women born and raised in Texas though in different generations and two small words and perspectives created quite a chaotic clamor of miscommunication. We got a lot of mileage in the laugh department out of that scene.

On a note familiar to all, think of the miscommunications that pop up between husband and wife, parent and child. We are occupying common airspace and still the different perspectives can raise havoc. Just try to decipher a text from a teen and my point made! We often look at our loved one and wonder how on earth they can think the way they do. Didn't they hear what we said? Shouldn't that have been plain enough? Yet, many a conversation includes the phrase, "I didn't mean it like that!" Well, that's what you said! Different perspectives from people living in the same space, um hmm, trouble in the making.

I shared that to say this; it doesn't take much for an intent and concept to be misinterpreted when viewed from different perspectives. The original scriptures and letters where written in a time, place, culture and language to which even the earliest of translators were unaccustomed. This is why it is vital that we dig into scripture to understand the perspectives of both the authors and receivers. Jesus spoke in parables in everyday language about everyday life so the common man/woman could understand. I think an injustice to both our own understanding and the original intent is unavoidable when we disregard the flavor and perspective of the time and culture. I doubt a scribe in merry old England had much exposure to Biblical Israel or the Jewish culture. The Gospel is timeless and meant for all. It is people and their perspectives, cultures and finite minds that try to put it in a familiar box to which they can identify and feel comfortable. I'm certain our 'comfort zone' was not what God had in mind. My challenge to us all is to don our hardhats to go mining to dig out the gold hidden within the various translations and version of scripture. I believe the there is more than nuggets of gold waiting for us. I think we will hit the Mother Load when we set aside our modern day perspectives and dig down to the Jewish-ness of it all. That's my opinion and my goal.

Serenity Prayer

God grant me the serenity
to accept the things I cannot change;
courage to change the things I can;
and wisdom to know the difference.

These words are the often-quoted Serenity Prayer. Most of us have heard this, prayed this, or at least read them somewhere. This past week I wanted to use them in a lesson plan for the junior high class I teach at church, so I decided to do a little research on the prayer. The back-story to this little prayer was enlightening.

First, let me say I was surprised to learn the most common version of the Serenity Prayer was just a piece of it. The above simple four-line prayer we know is but an opening to the original words written as part of a sermon by Reinhold Niebuhr, an American of German decent in wartime 1943. An American pastor that found himself at odds with Protestant and Catholic Church leaders because he felt they failed to lead their people in the crisis of war, he was a deeply devout man that wrestled daily with the problem of how to relate his innermost religious commitments to the public life of the community. The complete original prayer written in a time when the world was facing the evil of Hitler is as follows:

God, give us grace to accept with serenity
the things that cannot be changed,
Courage to change the things
which should be changed,
and the Wisdom to distinguish
the one from the other.

Living one day at a time,
Enjoying one moment at a time,
Accepting hardship as a pathway to peace,
Taking, as Jesus did,
This sinful world as it is,
Not as I would have it,
Trusting that You will make all things right,
If I surrender to Your will,
So that I may be reasonably happy in this life,
And supremely happy with You forever in the next. Amen.

From the beginning of the prayer, the need for serene acceptance is evident. In a war-torn world of the day, it might seem impossible to feel serene yet the need for acceptance of the current situations came with a serenity only found when one seeks it in God. The petition asks for courage to step up for changes necessary in the hostile environment of that day translates to a timeless plea that transcends any place in history. Though not mentioned, the times required discernment combined with wisdom to determine the things one could change from those things that we must accepted.

Still, in that time of war and evil threats to society as he knew it, this Pastor prayed for these things in order to live in appreciation of each day, accepting, as Christ did, the hardships as stepping-stones to living in peace by trusting and surrendering completely to God. He accepted this surrender would bring him reasonable happiness in this life and assured the supreme happiness in eternity with God.

The remarkable outcome of this humble prayer was that today, sixty-seven years after first penned, this prayer is one of the most recognizable and often quoted prayers of our day. It asks from God the power and skills to live, as He would have us live; recognizing complete surrender to God as the only path. That, my Friends, is a timeless message for us all in any generation.

Summer Baby Loving!

Well, Friends....We are blessed to have two of our 10 grandchildren visiting for a few day. They are, however, two of the younger 3, so my writing time has taken a big hit....ok, it's not even a consideration. So, just know, I am not shirking my duty to the blog, just spending quality G-kid time and chasing after a 1-1/2 yr old to boot! See you when time and energy allows!

Blessings,

M'Lynn

Relationship Deposits

There is a line in an old Bette Midler movie that stuck with me all these years. It resounded in my spirit because I identified with it. One simple sentence brought a complex mentality into play. One character said to another, "You have used me up!"

I've felt like that before. We've all had someone in our life at one time or another that simply drained our energy and emotional resources. Our reservoir of 'caring' for and about this person drained, leaving us nothing else to give. There is no water in an empty well. It can be taxing to hear their voice, see their face, or even think about having to interact with them. We tend to screen their calls, avoiding them at all cost whenever possible.

Typically, they have no idea they have 'insufficient funds in your relationship account' and, sadly, it would not occur to them to consider it one-way or the other. Often, they blow through relationships like a hurricane, leaving damage and devastation in their wake. Always assuming their joint account owners, be it a relative or (pseudo) friend, will be there to pick up the pieces repeatedly. They are confused and bewildered when they look around and do not find you ready, willing, and able meet their need when they need you once more. It is in those times they determine you were a lousy friend in the first place and deem you completely unreliable. They are attempting to draw on an empty account and do not realize it.

Relationships thrive when each person contributes to the relationship account. Mutual support and encouragement feed that account. Relationships are investments that grow when participants make regular deposits. There are circumstances when one person needs to make a significant withdrawal from the joint relationship account, like needing more from the joint owner during a personal crisis. However, when that same person continually withdraws and does not replenish once the crisis is over, it weakens and drains the account. People 'use other people up' when they drain relationship accounts. It's all mathematics, really. If you continually subtract and never add back in, you end up in the red both in financial matters and in relationship accounts.

We know when someone is draining our emotional relationship account; have we looked around lately to see if we may be draining an account with someone else? Since we can tell that the person draining our account with them doesn't seem to have a clue, is it possible we may be draining a different account without insight to that fact? All relationships, be they business related or personal, need a regular audit to determine the fiscal health and stability. Are our deposits greater than our withdrawals? Are we making a point of reviewing our relationship accounts, connecting with our joint account owners, to make sure we are on the same page? Does our account partners feel our presence in account maintenance or do they feel they are carrying the load? Do you know? Do you care? Feeling 'used up' by another is hurtful and disappointing. Take care to protect your investments in relationships. They add value and enrich our lives. Spend wisely and invest frequently; a good relationship is more valuable than gold. I am thankful for and blessed by mine!

Dem Bones

At the podiatrist office yesterday, we discussed the diagnostic trial of strapping my foot. It had made a difference so we moved on to the next step in what I now know is a series of steps of trial and error. Bummer! Who wants to go through multiple steps? I wanted it 'fixed' and I wanted it fixed now! Suffice it to say I am not getting my way.

This morning I am walking tall…or at least taller. I have hard plastic orthopedic devices in my shoes (which I now have to wear all the time) and a heel riser that makes me taller. They take pressure off the arch of my foot, and keep my foot from twisting sideways in an effort to make my deteriorating knee less painful. Who would have thought something in your shoe would make such a difference in your knee? They do not seem connected at first glance.

The ironic part is that we can't do anything about the pain in my foot yet, the original reason for going to the foot guy in the first place, because it will mask the diagnostic efforts we are taking for the knee. HUH? Can you hear that old childhood song…"with the toe bone connected to the foot bone, the foot bone connected to the ankle bone.."? "Dem bones, dem bones, dem bones…." FYI...Did you know that song was inspired by the Book of Ezekiel in the Bible? The name Ezekiel means 'God will strengthen'. Coincidence...I think not!

My knee situation has been painful for a long while. I ignored the pain the best I could and went about my life. Ignoring it did not either make it go away, make it better, or show any signs of wisdom on my part. I consulted a knee specialist before that diagnosed the deterioration and, wanting to avoid another surgery, suggested the device in my shoe but I, in my infinite wisdom, decided I could not afford to do that. Instead, I suffered daily with pain that often kept me awake at night, resorted to using a cane when my knee would buckle backward just so I could walk and regularly shuffled around like a decrepit old hobbit! Yep, I was smart all right! Pfst!! Were it not for the tumor growing in my foot, I would not have gone to the foot guy, hardheaded donkey that I am!!

Therefore, that orthopedic device I thought I could not afford before, I paid for yesterday…and for the heel riser that made me taller. FLASHBACK: To an old muffler commercial that said, "you can pay me now or pay me later…" The pitiful part is that I am paying with pain and suffering as well as cold cash.

This morning I felt that familiar 'holy tap on the shoulder', so I knew God was trying to tell me something. I listened. While all this foot/knee business is a sad, sad tale for me, it is a reflection of what we often do in our spiritual lives. We may have situations, circumstances, and behaviors in our lives that are damaging, causing pain yet we hardheadedly refuse to deal with or eliminate them from our lives. They may seem isolated from one another like my foot and knee did to me, yet the source of damage affects many areas of our lives. I could not have fixed my knee problem with any random piece of plastic in my shoe, it had to be the right form and fit to align my bones and tendons to the perfect order in which God made them. We have to make things right!

This doctor said he could not repair the damage, only make it less painful. Isn't that what we do, try different things to make the pain less offensive as we move through life? Surgeries will do what they can to repair the damage and remove the tumors but even then; they leave behind scar tissue that can still be a source of pain. The scars need not be on our skin, our spirits bear the scars of failed attempts at self-healing. God alone can make the required repairs to my knee and foot, restoring them to His perfect design. Anything other than His healing and restoring hand will fall short. People use work, drugs, alcohol, sex, sports, playing on the computer, spending money, and a host of other diversions, to mask the problem and try to assuage the pain. It is only when reaching out to God that we can begin to see a real difference in our spiritual lives. Nothing of the world restores like the healing love of God.

I had to acknowledge, accept responsibility for, and decide to take action on getting the help I needed. I have prayed about my knee for a long time. I asked God to do His part and make it go away. Yet I remained stiff-necked about following through on my part. I have suffered a great deal because of it and I have no one to blame but myself. God gave me enough knowledge to know to whom I should turn in the medical field yet I allowed my concern of spending the money dictate my choices. I kept waiting on God to fix it, never acknowledging the direction He was giving for doing just that. Meanwhile, more damage done, more pain suffered, and more money spent. Yep, I'm feeling pretty foolish about now. God faithfully does His part but we must not sit back and ignore ours. FAITH is an action word.

Love Triangle

Today my Honey and I celebrate our wedding anniversary. I can say in all honesty and sincerity that I love him more today than the day we wed. We have grown together, laughed a lot, fought on occasion, struggled through difficult issues, prayed together, shared the joy of childbirth when welcoming a new grandbaby, held hands through the painful deaths of loved ones, worked side by side and, yes, even wanted to pinch the others head off now and then. All in all, we have shared the best and worse of each other and still stand together waiting to see what life will bring our way next.

We were marriage war-scarred veterans when we met; too young to contemplate the thought of living alone the rest of our days and too old to be naive and idealistic about merging diverse lives. I do not believe in love at first sight. I think you can fall head over heels in 'lust at first sight' but not love. You cannot love what you do not know and you know nothing of a person until you have spent time getting to know them on purpose. Distance and time allowed my Honey and me to experience different aspects of one another, usually in a group setting, before deciding to explore the possibility of a serious personal relationship. We knew each other for the better part of two years before the courtship dance had us looking at one another in a different light. By then we had a realistic view and made decisions based on godly counsel, much prayer, and countless hours of discussion. Loving someone is a decision of commitment, not a fleeting emotion driven by hormones or capsized by circumstance.

There is but one key to making our relationship work and that is God. We both tried and failed in relationships before and knew a great deal about what not to do in a marriage. We looked back at the actions and attitudes we held in our past lives (no, not reincarnation, silly) and honestly evaluated our personal roles in those failures. We shared with one another about where we failed before…exposing one's vulnerability by laying out your failings and warts can be scary; ever-present is the fear of having those vulnerabilities used against you one day. This is where having a God-led marriage is vital. People are full of human weaknesses that rear an ugly head from time to time to zap your hot buttons when it suits them. Only when tempered by God can you move beyond those attempts because your flesh screams out for revenge and wants to throw fiery darts back. Let me stop here to say…This is one of things NOT to do in marriage.

Keeping score and tally sheets about who hurt whom, when, where and how often is another important NO-NO. If you must keep score, count and list the positive good things your spouse has done for you. This is most difficult on one of the 'pinch their head off' days but probably the most important times to do it. Since we are unlikely to think of anything positive when we are angry, keep a little notebook to log down the good things as they happen rather than fighting through a bramble of angry mental thorns to remember happier moments. Just whip out your little log and read. A reminder of your Better Half's better side can squelch many an angry attitude. They, too, may have cause for complaints about you. Wouldn't it be awesome to know they kept a running tally of your positive contributions, too?

Do not demand your partner share all your interests and opinions to be 'right'. We have many common interests and opinion but we have many different ones, too. In the foundation of a solid relationship, that's okay. Freedom to be different from one another and appreciated for who we are is vital to marriage. No one can walk through life feeling 'less than' or 'wrong' by virtue of his or her individualism. I do not believe we 'complete' another person either, contrary to what Hollywood may have you to believe. God made each of us unique individuals, complete within our selves. I do believe we can complement one another bringing complexities and depth to the relationship, however. This is one of my favorite aspects of our marriage. We complement one another; where I am weak, he is strong and vice versa. God gave every person gifts and talents; ours are different from one another yet work in harmony both in our marriage and in our service of the Lord. Now we have come full circle, back to having a God-led marriage.

When either man or woman tries to dominate a relationship, trouble lies in wait. When both lean on and serve God, letting His will and His Word lead the way, there is no power that can stand against you victoriously. Struggles will still come but you can rest in the knowledge that the Lord is leading the fight. Not only is He leading it, He has already won! His victory dictates your victory. I love God first and my husband second. He loves God first and me second. We would have it no other way! It's the only winning combination; our love triangle!