Competition

Competition can be a double-edged sword. On one side, you have healthy, good-natured competition. Then there is the other side that can be divisive and used for evil.

In our family - my husband and me, our grown kids, and now older grandchildren - we have a friendly baking competition each Christmas. This year, the category is homemade bread. Everyone is encouraged to enter. There is the usual smack-talk full of reminders of victories past, bragging rights, pumped up claims of expertise, and down right chest thumping (this from our men folk). It's good-natured and fun. Do not be deceived; this is full out competition! We take our bake-offs seriously! 

The first year we enlisted a neighboring couple as judges. That year, coconut crème pie was up. We do it right, the judges ate a piece of saltine cracker and drank water between each entry. While they took their responsibility seriously, we have not asked them back as judges. Seems the man did not know the difference between fresh whipped cream and deflated meringue. As the entry with the fresh whipped cream, I was a bit put off when he thought my meringue fell!! Taste buds of a cave man! To this day, I harangue him about that!

Last year, Haylie, our oldest granddaughter won with her brownies. This year, we have a new first-time contestant, son Kristopher. I think he picked an ambitious year to enter; baking bread is not for the faint of heart. He was seriously shopping for the perfect bread-baking pan a couple of days after Thanksgiving where we made the announcement we would compete with bread. I did not tell him my first several attempts at making bread and/or rolls ended with lumps of a clay-like substance suitable for building patios. They were inedible, unattractive and tossed out – one tearful batch after another. Thankfully, those years are behind me.

That is a good example of healthy competition. There are plenty of the unhealthy types floating around out to snare you, too.

Believe it or not, there are some seemingly benign factors competing to steal your time and attention away from your faith walk. It may not seem such a bad way to pass a Sunday morning by sleeping-in and snuggling under the covers but if it becomes a powerful habit, it can keep you from fellowship with the brethren. Who among hasn't been tempted to take the family to the lake or beach instead of church? Catching 15 minutes of extra sleep might not seem evil, but if that same 15 minutes used to be spent reading scripture before work, it elevates it's power from simple extra sleep to roadblocks in your daily diet of God's Word. Fear, depression, anxiety compete with peace, joy and contentment. Flesh-natured thoughts compete with spiritual mindsets. Unhealthy competition opportunities are all around us.  

So, Friends, let's continue to encourage one another to fight the good fight against those dastardly elements competing with all that godly in our lives. Let us endeavor to make all our competitions good, pure, clean, and holy.

I'll let you know who wins the bread competition this year.

Walk the Talk

I often write about being aware of the thoughts we allow to occupy our mind, taking negative thoughts captive and looking for the positive, godly things on which to ponder. Our thoughts lead the way for our attitudes and the attitudes beget our actions. This morning I am trying to live what I preach in my efforts to write the blog.

Here's my dilemma…it's not so much that I have negative thoughts flying around inside my head but a barrage of random disconnected thoughts. Apparently I am so set in my ways (not a good thing) that I am unable to function in all but the most basic of tasks while the kaleidoscope of thoughts swirl and twirl in my mind. Egad!

I wrote the other day of distraction when trying to write. We have family visiting and I love it…most of the time. I caught myself feeling irritated that I cannot follow my set writing schedule. My head wants to get into the storyline I am finishing for a book but my hands are working on the next meal preparations, my personal Martha mode! Characters interacting and potato peeling happening vie for my attention. I just shed my blue jeans because it felt like a spider crawling up my leg. I was not so concerned about the spider but the crawling tickled my leg and distracted me. No spider found except the one that overnight made a lovely web between a large floral arrangement in front of my desk and the stack of goods gathered for the garage sale to raise funds for the mission trip next January. The taunting calendar covered in upcoming events this month is hanging next to me, just inside my peripheral vision. Down the hall, our three beloved dogs are starting to whimper and do the "Get me out of this cage" dance. Is it any wonder my thoughts are scattered and disjointed this morning?

So, let's break this down and dig for the 'positive' in the distractions listed above.

1. First, I made the decision not to even try to work on the book while guest were here long before they arrived so I do not know why those characters keep popping in but I choose to believe it is because (for now) we are one.

2. I am very thankful I have food to feed my guest. Guest without food to feed them makes for a lousy visit.

3. Family visiting – grandkids I do not get to see often enough and an interesting cousin with years to catch up on; I wanted to focus on time with them. Hugs & snuggles..yippie!

4. No spider in the jeans but the tickling sensation is still there. (Hmm..) Still, I have feelings in my legs; some people do not.

5. I do not have issues about spiders; they eat other insects I might have issues with so I try to leave them alone when possible. This spider faces relocation where it can build another web that is not between the printer and me.

6. I will happily live with 'stuff' stacking up to help raise funds for a mission trip any day!

7. My calendar helps me remember how blessed I am to have friends and family with birthdays to celebrate and ministry events to attend for serving Jesus!

8. My dogs give me so much unconditional love I would be quite remiss if I allowed ill feelings to linger over stopping to care for their needs. Lap full of canine kids makes it all worthwhile.

Yep, I am one blessed woman! I lead a full, busy life with people and critters that love me. Tomorrow I take G-daughter #2 home, visit two other G-kids on my way to pick up another three coming back with me. Friday, my Honey and three G-kids head off to church camp while G-daughter #1 and I spend some quality time together. Pups will need attention, garden will have weeds to pull, meals will be prepared, prayers said, and Bible read. The blog may or may not be written. The character in the book will live in limbo until I return to them. If they pop into my thoughts, I will listen to them, maybe make a few notes, but keep them in perspective as I enjoy the blessing that is my life with family in the house.

Thoughts…attitudes…actions. Putting my scattered thoughts in writing helped sort them; looking for the 'positive' keeps them in perspective. My attitude is better and my actions reflect a more calm and pro-active me. Thank you, Jesus!

You Want Me to do What?

My husband and three other brave adult souls are taking the kids from church to summer camp later this week. Three of our grandchildren are going with them. The oldest of our three going is already here and we are enjoying hanging out with him. I asked if he was interested in earning some spending money for camp. His reply, "Doing what?" I explained his response did not answer my question. He said he might be interested depending on what the job was. I went on to say a desire to earn money for camp was either there or not. Yes, de decided, he wanted to earn money for camp….his voice dripped with wary hesitancy.

As his grandparent, I was a little less than thrilled by his reaction. I would like to believe he knew me well enough to know I would not ask anything of him he was not capable of doing. I would have liked to see an attitude of eagerness to perform chores for the opportunity and satisfaction of earning 'fun money'. We have provided the way for him to go to camp and we will provide him with the things he needs while there. Still, I would like to see my G-kids grow up with a mentality of working for what they have, appreciation for opportunities to be more self-sufficient, not always expecting life and others to fill their extended hand and every whim. Now, please let me say in all fairness, this boy has asked nothing of us as far as spending money and he is not walking around with an attitude of entitlement. Some do.

The poignant part of this story is that his reaction to my offer was very similar to how we often react to God. He provides all we need because He loves us; He isn't going to ask more of us than we can handle yet when given the opportunity we hang back wondering what it will required of us. Is it going to take much effort on my part? Will I have to endure mediocre working conditions? Will the job be pleasing to me? Will I have to sacrifice or step out of my comfort zone? Might I be embarrassed and self-conscience?

"Seriously, Lord, I want to do something to work for you but can you make something I would really like?" Hmm….wonder if God is a little less than thrilled by our response, too. Something to think about.

We Believe in Miracles

Miracles happen all around us every day. God is still in the miracle business regardless of those that think they ended with the last Chapter of the Bible. There are those that do not believe in what they can not see; must be sad to be one of those people. We do not see oxygen either but we count on it being there….that’s how I feel about the miracles God is doing all the time. We had a miracle in our family just last week.

Daughter # 2 had called with upsetting news our grandson #1 had gotten from the eye doctor. He merely went in to get a new prescription for contacts. Then his eyes started doing strange things, working independently of one another and he was seeing double. This doctor started telling them he would need test for neurological diseases and to find out if he had a tumor behind his eye. Telling a 16 year old kid looking forward to getting his driver’s licenses that he can’t drive is upsetting news to him. A mother hearing ‘neurological disease’ and ‘tumor’ was too!

She called to tell Papa John and me about it. We were at the dinner table when she called and Papa John could tell from my side of the conversation that one of our kids was in trouble. He quietly asked, “Which one of my grandsons is having trouble with his eyes?” Then he started praying right then and there. When the call ended I joined him in prayer. We believe in miracles.

Later that evening I ‘talked’ to our grandson #1 via an online social network. I asked if his eyes were doing any better. He said every thing had cleared up, his eyes were working together and the double vision had gone away! I told him we had covered him so deep in prayer there was no way the eye problem could live. He said he did not doubt it for a moment!

Telling my friend, Helen, the next day about our G-son, she reminded me that I had been in prayer all the day before asking for a miracle. When we heard about our boy’s problem I had forgotten I had been praying for a miracle about something else. God sent a much better miracle than what I had been asking for in the first place. I told my G-son that God answered my prayer in a much more important and significant way than I could have imagined. Isn’t that just like God?! What an important lesson for a teen to see when God does a miracle in his own life like that! What a testimony!

Miracles today? Oh, yes! They are all around us. Oh, by the way….the miracle I had been praying for in the first place….well, that whole issue just dissolved like snow in south Texas. God is faithful. Give Him praise!

Will You Love Jesus More?

One of my all time favorite Christian songs is ‘Will You Love Jesus More?” by Phillips, Craig & Dean. I remember well the moment I first hear the song. I was driving in Austin, Texas and put in a tape my friend, Donna, had loaned me. It was an awesome album but this song cut to my soul and wrote its message on my heart as surely as if by God’s finger itself. It remains the cry of my heart to this day.

The chorus asks the questions...

Will you love Jesus more
When we go our different ways
When this moment is a memory
Will you remember His face
Will you look back and realize
You sensed His love more than you did before
I'd pray for nothing less
Than for you to love Jesus more

If we are to leave any kind of legacy or inheritance to our children and their children, this should be the one we pray for the most! My Honey has a heart’s desire to leave an inheritance to our familial generations, what better than the love for Jesus?! Money and properties will come and go and it only takes a few unwise decisions in care and maintenance to cause them to disappear. But loving Jesus is an eternal gift that never fades or runs out or is moved by the economy or political party in power. To pass that on is an inheritance and legacy above all else. I can say in confidence that it was my grandfather on one side and my grandmother on the other that were my childhood influences when it came to loving and seeking the Lord. My memories of her reading her Bible every night and of him preaching in tents in the sweltering summer heat are memories I cherish. Words from the song address this, too….

I'd like to keep these memories
In frames of gold and silver
And reminisce a year from now
About the smiles we've shared
But above all else I hope you will come
To know the Father's love
When you see the Lord face to face

You'll hear Him say "well done"

The calling of a Christian missionary still burns hot in my heart and spirit. I believe that is a calling God gave us all when Jesus said to take the gospel to all people. We start in our homes and with those in our lives but this is a legacy and inheritance we can share with everyone! There is no limit of supply; it is multiplied every time someone starts to love Jesus. There is no such thing as too many people to love! Jesus provides the legacy and inheritance….our part is to share the abundance.

As the closing words of this, my favorite song says:

I'd pray for nothing less
Than for you to love Jesus more!

Mexican Petunias – 1, Lynn – 0

Delighting in the absolutely perfect weather yesterday I took the opportunity to spend time out in the yard. I can not “do” full sun so this glorious late February morning beckoned me with urgency. I made the usual walk about around the raised veggie bed and dug out some pesky bull nettle trying to grab hold.

Moving on to the Herb Canoe I pulled out the growing and dead stuff of curious origins. We have a weed that looks similar to cilantro that grows profusely all over the place. You can not kill this stuff! Cilantro is a household favorite and has self-seeded for years….this year it missed the boat…literally! No cilantro waving about in the boat but it is growing well in patches located around the canoe. Any attempts to mow that area would take out not only my beloved cilantro but the Bluebonnet plants intermingled with them. Yea, another excuse not to mow or weed-eat! You just do not mess with cilantro and Bluebonnets in our part of Texas.

Dancing around the back yard like a wood nymph in the moonlight I felt so full of energy and vigor I braved the front yard. It’s not a yard really; it’s the downhill side and majority of our one acre. I tiptoed through the native yuccas and remains of my rock garden making my way to the swing about half way down the hill in the one shady spot out there. The view is beautiful looking north-northwest from that swing. Oh the hours, days and gallons of sweat that went into creating a small flat tier to sit that A-frame on! Thankfully the older grandsons still resided here and child labor was abundant. Thank you, Lord, for grandsons! It was all worth it in the end and we have enjoyed many years of ‘swingin’ together admiring God’s handiwork. Ok, we admired our handiwork, too. The ‘new’ has worn off and hill country vegetation has taken a foothold once again but the splendor of the view from the swing still captivates and entices.

To get to front yard I had to pass by my wild and wooly bed of Mexican Petunias. I wish I could take credit for its glorious splendor but they grow profusely regardless of attention or neglect. Ascending the driveway they greet you at the top of the hill, waving their purple jewels in the slightest of breezes. Mine have grown very tall, some taller than my 5’ 3” stature. So, in their time of winter hibernation, I decided this day of perfect weather was THE day to prune them back to a more manageable size before new growth caused me pause and guilt over said pruning. I was singing like one of the Seven Dwarfs on my way to work with the large, long and heavy pruning shears over my shoulder. Today was the day I would conquer and control the prolific beast.

Before I could make a substantial dent in the dormant woody stalks, I was feeling the weight of the large pruning sheers searing in my shoulders, throbbing aches in my lower back, swelling knees and spaghetti-like arms rendering me all but useless. Foiled by my own weenie-ness! Grrrr. Taken down by flowers, how shameful. I was feeling so thankful for having a strong husband….wishing he was home. Twenty-two years of his physical job have left him with awesome upper body strength, biceps of steel and solid arms I have found comfort and security in over the years. My ultimate go-to place when I need a shoulder to feel secure and safe. He would teach those pesky Mexican Petunias who is boss in quick order!

“Oh, Honey……”

Dear Tooth Fairy

Being something of a sentimental sort I tend to save little things that touch my heart and use them in unordinary ways. For instance, in my Bible I have a note written on a page that came from a notepad shaped and decorated to look like a ladies sandal. The note was written by Daniel, one of the grandsons that lived with us for a while. It is in childish scrawl and says, “Dear toothfairy I’m missing my TOOTH! Thank you” It was left under his pillow one night in hopes the Tooth Fairy would leave him money for the tiny tooth he had misplaced.

To-date, that note melts my heart with same the warm fuzzies I felt sneaking out of his room after reading it by the dim night light when my tooth fairy duties were completed. I use the note as a bookmarker and it lives in the chapter of Proverbs. I read Proverbs each day and see the note often. It never fails to make me smile.

I have a rubber mouse that lives in my purse; in fact, he travels from one to another as my outfits change. I’m not sure how I came to have this rubber mouse in my purse in the first place but I’ve carried him around for at least fourteen years. One Sunday morning in church, grandbaby Hannah was getting restless and fussy. I pulled the mouse out and she was delighted by him. She played quietly the rest of the service in my lap. I can not tell you how many babies and toddlers have been entertained by that silly mouse over the years! Hannah is now nearly fourteen years old and he is still my traveling companion. I’ve pondered this mouse issue in hopes of understanding why I keep him. All I can tell you is that when I feel him in the dark recesses of a purse or bring him out for a wiggly child I see the smiling face of baby Hannah and I get too mushy for words; so the mouse stays.

These are but two examples of the little things of my life that take me to another place and time when an especially sweet memory was born. We like to think we have captured the important moments to retain for all time. They silently tiptoe away without notice more often than not. We try to establish traditions we hope our children will find poignant and cherish but our adult perspective and their child’s mind file events under different categories…if they are filed at all. We teach them of the Tooth Fairy, the Easter Bunny, Santa and work to preserve their innocent beliefs as long as we can. I think it’s to preserve our youthful memories just as much as it is for the kids.

As a parent and now grandparent I relish all the precious times I had with the kids of my life. My little things may seem weird to you but they are treasures to my heart.

Can you imagine how many memories of His children God, Father to us all, must have to reflect on? Boggles the mind! He made provision to forgive and forget the bad and ugly sinful things we do, so His memory storehouse must truly runneth over with warm and fuzzy moments that bring His heart to that place of sweet remembrance.

Mouse or no mouse, life with Hannah was not easy yet it is the mouse that travels with me, not the heartache and disappointments. I can not even wrap my head around all God has set aside on my behalf so He can enjoy the warm, fuzzy times with me. I’m astounded by that!

My prayer for each of us today is that we strive to live and serve Him in such a way that we actively and purposely build sweet memories with our Father God. Those are memories that last!

Quote of the Day - Revisited

Morning, Friends.........this morning finds me plagued with a migraine headache which has rendered me unable to write; so I am sending a previous post. It holds up to the test of time. If you've not read it before, I hope you enjoy, if you have read it, I pray God will shed a new light of insight for you. See you tomorrow! Lynn

I collect quotes; the ones that strike a chord in me when I read them. I'm sharing one with you this morning. Here it is:

If things are not going well with you, begin your effort at correcting the situation by carefully examining the service you are rendering, and especially the spirit in which you are rendering it.

Roger Babson(1875-1967, American statistician, columnist)

I don't know if the author was a spiritual man or not but his philosophy certainly applies in a Christian walk, doesn't it?! It's difficult to look at ourselves as the source of our woes when we're so busy pointing at others, the enemy and/or situations.

As a parent, the kids give me all the examples I need (see how I'm talking about their examples & not mine, hehehe). One child or another would come telling some sad, sad tale about how a sibling did them wrong and the first thing I asked was, "What did you do to them?" It made them so mad when I did that! After a bit, we would eventually get around to discovering the action that inspired the assault in the first place. When this was brought into the light, they invariably came back with, " but I was just...(fill in the blank).." Somehow they have justified their own actions but want retribution whacked down on the other person for their heinous crime.

No one likes to own responsibility for the not so wonderful actions, behaviors, attitudes and issues of their life. This is especially true when we KNOW we are not acting as Christ would have us do, yet we spend a great deal of energy listing all the reasons we can't. "....but I was just ...." "...but they..." "...don't have time..." the list goes on and on. We've all been there and said those very things.

The Christian's life should reveal the truth of who Jesus Christ is. In so doing, it can provide a godly example and legacy for future generations. God wants us to invest our lives in ways that bring honor and glory to Him. Doing so, we will also be developing a rich spiritual inheritance to give to others.

Again I ask, what legacy will we leave behind?

“If things are not going well with you, begin your effort at correcting the situation by carefully examining the service you are rendering, and especially the spirit in which you are rendering it.”

We could leave a better legacy by examining our own hearts and actions honestly; making adjustments to realign with godly principles.

"No matter how pretty it may be, the view through rose colored glasses is neither honest nor accurate. Our actions need to stand up in the clear bright Light that is God."
Connie Lynn Bermea (1953- American Christian writer)

You may quote me on that!

Inner Child - Which Way Does it Go?

Some of you may be old enough to remember the TV show with Art Linkletter called ‘Kids say the darnedest things’. I am old enough to remember. It was always cute and usually embarrassing to the parents, which, of course, made it funnier. I received the following message from my precious daughter-in-love(law) regarding a comment made by our six year old granddaughter, Rylie. She said, “Rylie told me today that she can't play the games that her friends want to play because she will have an allergic reaction to doing what she doesn't want to do.” Where do they get this stuff? It was funny but it very clearly represents a child’s mentality…..it’s all about me! Limited to children? I think not.

Looking at life through a child’s eyes our perspective is a bit narrower though I can not help but believe it is filled with far more wonderment and awe. They are more open and accepting than most adults, not yet jaded by the evil in this world, disappointments and disillusions. Perhaps that is why Jesus said in Mark 10:14-15 But when Jesus saw this, He was indignant and said to them, "Permit the children to come to Me; do not hinder them; for the kingdom of God belongs to such as these. Truly I say to you, whoever does not receive the kingdom of God like a child will not enter it at all."

There is distinct difference between being child-like in acceptance and childish in attitude. Child-like is innocent, accepting, inclusive; childish is self-centered, self-serving, and exclusive.

The crux of the matter is we must learn to adopt the child-like acceptance of God’s supremacy and openly believe…TRUST, HAVE FAITH…in spite of our adult ‘worldly’ knowledge and life-tinted vision if we are to receive the kingdom of God. No small task, indeed, but the rewards are great and eternal, the struggle temporary.

To no surprise the Bible addresses this, too, in 1 Corinthians 13:11 When I was a child, I talked like a child, I thought like a child, I reasoned like a child; now that I have become a man, I am done with childish ways and have put them aside.

Note it says “…I am done with childish way..” not “…done with my child-likeness…”

The cuteness of Rylie’s rationale wears thin as we get older and it ceases to be cute very quickly. None are immune to lingering childish ways so we must be on constant guard. I, for one, have held on to a lingering rebellion. It is a small scale rebellion to me but it does reflect a heart that is not totally void of issues to clean out. I go IN the Exit doors and OUT the Entrance doors at stores. It just grates on me that someone is telling where I can and cannot go….so I rebel. That’s my sin, the secret is out. I have practiced this more years than I can count and it went virtually unnoticed until the grandkids lived with us. One of them noticed and asked about it. I explained what I was doing and they all thought it amusing. So, pitiful excuse of a grandmother that I am, I laid my rebellious heart open to the kids; they started doing the same thing. The actual action we were taking wasn’t so bad but the fact that I openly practiced rebellion in front of them was! It DID become an issue with my Honey one day when the kids explained to him he was going out the wrong door and why. Oops!

See? You have to be on guard every minute because when you get to Heaven you want to see the Entrance door, NOT the Exit sign!!

Winds of Adversity - Revisited

Good morning, Friends......

Sending out another post of previous thoughts while still on holiday vacation. I am spending time with a variety of grandchildren and thankful for the time to do so.It is cold out and sleet is hitting the windows; a perfect day for staying inside and just enjoying one another. May your day be filled with love and laughter!

Lynn

Winds of Adversity - Revisited
I felt compelled to share a story this morning of a situation God used to teach me a life lesson. Have you noticed I like life lessons? So very often, God places them right in front of us; we just need to be paying attention.

This story is true and happened when the grandkids were living with us. It was a chilly and gusty school day morning. It was more gusty than chilly. I was standing at the bottom of the hill with the kids waiting for the bus. It comes from a general north direction, so, I was facing the full force of the wind. Donovan had a heavy jacket with a hood, so he simply turned his back to the wind. Daniel had a heavy jacket but no hood; he stood under my arm so his ears would be covered. Sometimes he faced the wind because he just couldn't stand not looking for the bus. Other times he turn his back to the wind, but still under my arm. Douglas had on a light jacket and no hood. He snuggled as close to me as he could and I had both gloved hands covering his ears. Hannah had a heavy long coat with a hood. When facing the wind, she complained about it being in her face. With her back to the wind, she complained about her back getting too cold. Like I said, it was more gusty than chilly, but the north wind made it seem much colder than it actually was.

Here is the life lesson. God stands facing all things in life for us, head on. We have a choice about how we receive that protection and covering from Him. We can choose to stand apart from Him (like Donovan) defiantly turning our back to adversity, which never works because adversity doesn't care which way you face. It will pound you regardless. Or, we can get up under the arm of God knowing we need His protection, but pop out (like Daniel) simply because we do not trust Him enough to watch over our lives for us. We just have to see for ourselves. Or we can (like Hannah) stand apart, in spite of her warm jacket and hood(blessings), complain anyway. She had the longest, heaviest coat of all yet complained and grumbled the most. Or we can (like Douglas) snuggle up to God, reaping the reward of His warmth and protection, trusting Him completely to watch out for us.

The wind was the same on all of us, it was the different ways we reacted to it that made all the difference. The Lord showed me this lesson while out in the chilly wind. His perfect timing allowed me to 'see' what He wanted me to get. I believe, had I been there complaining about having to face the wind and protecting the kids, He would not have not shown me that lesson because I would not have been ready to receive it.

I'm very thankful that the Holy Spirit lives in me and that I've learned to be still and listen for that quiet voice. We CAN & DO drown out the voice of the Holy Spirit when we are caught up in the hustle and bustle of our noisy lives. Today, take the time to be still and just listen. I shudder to think of the lessons I've missed because I was too busy to pay attention.

One short final note, each of the children handled things that morning in true keeping with their character. Your 'Character' is who and how you really are. We can all put on our 'nice face' for the world to see but when faced with the cold wind of adversity, our character jumps out large and refuses to be ignored! Ask the Holy Spirit to show you what people see when they look at you in times of adversity. What does your character say?

Manners Matter - Revisited

Last night we received a phone call from our grandson, Daniel, now 12 1/2 years old. He was passing time and thought to give us a call. Papa John put him on speakerphone so we could both listen. Daniel is an engaging child and we enjoy him. He and his siblings lived with us for several years; a life altering event for one and all.

Two things came up during the conversation that made the hearts of these grandparents proud and thankful. One, Daniel used excellent manners when speaking to us. We are from a time in space where saying "yes, Ma'am and no, Sir" were expected; we passed that on to our children and our children's children. We taught that saying "yeah?" or "what?" when we called their name was unacceptable and, rather than calling out from another room, they were to come to us to see what we wanted. To us, these were basic good manners. The conversation last night showed that Daniel respected us enough to address us with the decorum we instilled even though he is no longer under our roof. Secondly, he talked about he and his brother doing their household chores that day. He said they discussed the fact that they learned to do them the right way because we taught them to and they were glad we had because they would have gotten in trouble had they not. Wow! This brought a tear to my eye. Every now and then you hear something like that and realize you must have done something right once in a while when bring up the children. Those rare moments are nuggets of parenting gold!

As we move into the last few days before Christmas, be aware of your own manners toward others and their's. I'm sharing some thoughts on that subject below. Manners matter, no matter who you are!

Lynn

Manners Matter- Revisited
We now live in a world where your life can be made miserable, sometimes even threatened, if you are not considered 'politically correct'. You may offend one race, religion, ethnic group, political group, short people, tall people, fat people, skinny people, carnivores, vegetarians, vegans, beer drinkers, wine sippers, teetotalers, people living in the north, people living in the south, east coasters, west coasters, mountain dwellers, farmers, motorcyclists, SUV drivers, red scarves, blue scarves, cyclist, runners, joggers, gym goers, yoga enthusiast, rock climbers, chess players, those in gated communities, those in mobile homes, those that pray, those that don't want you to be able to pray, etc, etc, etc........this is but a small list of potential offenses.

My goodness, it is enough to boggle the mind! Who, pray tell, sits around and makes the decisions on what is or isn't politically correct? Do they get paid for this or is it a labor of love? At one time I thought there needed be a book with all the Do's and Don'ts listed but then I realized that could not be possible; who would decide what color the book, the materials the cover would be made of, the language it was written in? Again, the list goes on.

If you want a micro-view of the state of personal interaction in the world, just observe a group of children for a while. I had the opportunity to do so this past weekend and it is not always a pretty sight. The old adage that children learn what they live rings loud and true today! In any restaurant you will find someone among the diners that is oblivious to those around them or simply may not care regardless. So they behave in such a manner that it is obvious they have no consideration for anyone else. This is played out in every school cafeteria across the country.

Perhaps I am showing my age but I believe that manners absolutely DO matter. If people simply used common courtesy and basic good manners, this world would be a better place. Therein lies the problem; what constitutes 'common courtesies and good manners'? Cultural dictations being as diverse as they are make this a mine field of opportunities to misstep. But in our own country, there should be a standard accepted as the norm without fear of being politically incorrect.

When training people for the mission field we are careful to research and teach cultural differences so as to not offend our host countries people. This makes sense. What possible good could we do if we walked around offending people all the time?!

Shouldn't we do as much for our children? I believe, as a nation, we have gone too far in the direction of protecting people's rights to be obnoxious and rude. It becomes dangerous when we protect rights to be demanding and self-serving but do not protects the rights to common courtesy. It will never be important on a national level unless it is taught and expected in every home. I'm not talking about insisting that each child be taught which fork to use in a formal setting, I'm talking about teaching and requiring our children to thoughtful, considerate, compassionate people; requiring more of themselves and passing a heritage of good manners and civilities on to their own children, generation after generation. As it stands now, we are rearing generations of educated savages. If you think that is too strong a comment, go to a school playground at recess.

The state of our children reflects the state of our nation. We have lazy, selfish, unmotivated children with a high level of entitlement that will one day be the leaders of our country. Yes, there are exceptions to the rule but as a whole, we are in trouble. When children are allowed to be rude and ugly to one another, as well as with adults, we are perpetuating a mentality that eats away at the core of moral values. Manners and good behavior starts at home. Etiquette starts there but should continue on throughout a lifetime. When people start treating each other as one person of value and worth to another, then and only then will we have a chance to build the kind of world worthy of passing on.

Manners matter! Pass them on.

Being Independent is Highly Overrated

By virtue of being American, we are raised with the pioneer independent spirit. We pride ourselves in our national mentality of independence. Sadly, in the world in which we live, that might not be such a bad thing. Or is it? It becomes a problem when we apply that thought process to our spiritual life. We can not function outside of God's will for us and still enjoy the fruit He has promised. Worldly success and Godly vision rarely are the same. You can be very successful and follow the Lord's ways, but it takes a self-discipline many never achieve. Self gets in the way.

As for me, I'd rather live in a tent and follow the Lord than dwell in a mansion of worldly living. I tried living my life "my way' as the old song tells of, failed miserably in every aspect of it, and finally surrendered to the Lord all those years ago.

At the time my Honey and I married, I had been my sole support for many years. I wasn’t ‘rolling in the dough’ as the saying goes but I kept a roof over my head, never went hungry, paid my bills, bought my own vehicle, went on mission trips, tithed every Sunday and was actively serving Him in many different ways. I had, thanks to God, been blessed with promotion on my job. Life had taught me not to depend on another person and I was fiercely independent. Sounds like a contradiction, doesn’t it?

Moving in with my new husband was a blessing and a challenge at the same time. Learning to live with a partner again did not come easily. First, I planned on being transferred with my company from Austin to San Antonio. That did not happen and the bottom line was that the nice income I/we were expecting as a given was not to be. This came as an emotional and psychological blow to the former Miss Independent, now Mrs. Married with no job. I searched for a job with comparable pay, found nothing. I did find a job I enjoyed a lot in spite of the pitiful salary but physical issues forced me to resign. I was forced to be dependent on my Honey. This was painful and terrifying to me; my history reared its ugly head to remind me that depending on a man was not a good thing.

The one thing that kept me from losing my mind was that I knew, knew God had put my Honey and I together to serve Him in ministry. It was through an immense amount of prayer and Bible reading that I realized God was using that time of transition to build my faith in Him and my new husband. Growing pains, my constant companion; I learned to simply stand in faith on the plan God had for my life.

Soon after, we became a family of six rather than two when four of our grandchildren came to live with us. They were young, troubled by all the pain in their own lives and needed me home with them. Had I been working, I would have had to quit. God had used my transition time to prepare me for life with my husband and children.

Every day I'm thankful for the wake-up call from God, as painful as it was at the time, because my life today would not be possible had all that not happened. Independence, I have discovered, is not for me! Dependent financially on my husband does not equate to lack of self-esteem or personal failure; I want and need to be dependent on the Lord. I love being partners with my Honey and, though my contributions to our life together do not come in the form of a paycheck, they have value and make our lives richer for them. I have learned to lean on my husband and not see that as a weakness; I have learned to trust him more and more as I trust Him more. Funny how that worked.

Thanksgiving Traditions

The holiday season is upon us. From my perspective as a grandparent, I have a lot of family holiday memories; some are great, some are not so great. My Proverbs reading today, Chapter seventeen, verse one, stirred up many of those old memories. It reads: Better is a dry morsel with quietness than a house full of feasting with strife. The common denominator between Biblical times and our contemporary traditional family gathering is people; food and people.

We have Hallmark commercials and Norman Rockwell showing us what an ideal family meal might look like. We have grand expectations of a picture perfect Thanksgiving with multiple generations gathered around a bountiful table. Then people show up and reality sets in. Life is not like a sixty second commercial and we are setting ourselves up for disappointment when we think it should be.

I love to cook, love to have a kitchen full of family bustling around in harmony to get everything done; working together like a fine tuned watch. In my world there are those of us that work toward making that happen, and then there are those that sit in the other room visiting while we are making that happen. Interestingly enough, it seems the line that divides in the preparation is also the line that divides when it comes time to cleaning up, as well. It is not gender specific; it is not age related.

I considered counting up the number of able-bodied people attending such an event over the age of, say five. Five year olds can place napkins around the table, train them to be a part of the solution. Anyway, as people come in, have them draw a bean out of a small bowl which contains two types of beans. All of the brown bean holders are now the Prep people and the white bean holders are the Clean-up people. Yes, I’ve considered that but some will show up at the last minute or late…not conducive to the Prep group…..and often with their contribution not ready to be served. Throws the timing of the meal and the ‘bean plan’ right out of the window! Soon, those not doing the prep work start milling around because they are hungry. They want to snack on the food the Prep people have been trying to get to the table! This is usually the point where I start slapping hands and ordering people out of the kitchen unless they have a spoon stirring a pot.

One year in a moment of total frustration, my daughter announced that no one, NO ONE could have dessert until the kitchen was cleaned up from lunch. She’s a genius! The flurry of activity that followed was astounding.

Every family comes complete with frustrating times and characters. Yet, we love each one and look forward to the next time we gather our chicks. Love overrides it all. God gave us family to begin with and we have so very much for which to be thankful. Whatever other traditions you pass on to your family, make sure the Lord is primary among them. Isaiah 59:21 says:

As for Me, this is My covenant or league with them, says the Lord: My Spirit, Who is upon you, and My words which I have put in your mouth shall not depart out of your mouth, or out of the mouths of your children, or out of the mouths of your children’s children, says the Lord, from henceforth and forever. Pass that around the table!

Child of My Child

Today is the sixteenth anniversary of the birth of my firstborn’s firstborn; child of my child, daughter of my daughter, Haylie Marie. I was blessed to be present at her birth and remember it as well as her mother’s birth. It was a day of joy and anticipation. An overwhelming emotion comes over you as you watch your child look into the face of her child for the first time. The miracle that we call life should not be taken for granted.

The magnitude of that wonderful event, as big as it was at the time, did not fully sink into my understanding until I was reading the Bible one day. I'll admit it was difficult to read about all that “begetting” going on throughout the pages of Biblical history. I would skim through quickly giving neither my attention nor the proper respect due to why it was important. To me, at the time, it was just something to get through. Then one day, early in my grandparent years, it hit me; I was a part of that begetting, had done some begetting of my own and now my children were begetting. This was my first authentic connection to the Old Testament. I felt for the first time a part of God’s Big Picture. I was a tiny piece of thread in the tapestry of eternity. Somewhere was a line from me to the man and woman God crafted and created with His own hands. I was family.

Sounds strange now to say I never felt connected to the Old Testament before that moment. In my Christian infancy I felt as if that part of the Bible was more for historical reference. All my life I believed the story of creation, Noah’s great ark adventure, Moses parting the waters and I was certain God lived in heaven. I expected to go there myself. The part of the Bible that applied to me, as far as my ignorance was concerned, was the New Testament. The rest was just a prelude of things to come. I was right and I was wrong. It was a prelude in that it came before what was written about Christ; but it was the foundation, on which the time of Christ’s life on earth was foretold; the roadmap from creation to redemption. It is very trunk of God’s family tree.

Today I will pick up my tenth grandchild, Madielynn Marie, for an overnight visit. We will watch her every move in amazement and wonder as parents and grandparents tend to do. My husband will comment about how much she looks like him and to prove it, he will refer to the picture of our son, her father, as a small boy. It is true, there is a strong family resemblance but it is the big picture of God’s family that we hope to pass on to our children and our children’s children for generations to come.

Happy Birthday, Haylie, my love. You are family and I thank God for you!