The morning is still dark and chilly out. Sitting by an open window, I shivered thinking I should close the window but before I could rise to do so the mournful crowing of a neighborhood rooster pierced the morning quiet. My mind took a mental journey to another cold dark morning with dawn not yet making an appearance and being ushered in by the crow of a rooster. For a moment I could smell the smoke of a camp fire, hear the muffled shuffling feet as they stomped in an effort to get warmth all the way to the toes. My heart seemed to race though I knew not why. People talking almost in a whisper as they tend do in the dark. A heavy angst weighed me down; my heart so full of fear and confusion I thought it might explode. For that split second in time I thought this must be as if I was standing beside Peter as the rooster cried out. I do not know if I could bear what he must have felt when the knowledge of his betrayal first sunk into his mind, then his heart. It must have felt as if the weight of consuming shame crushed the very life from him. Was inescapable remorse and self-disgust wringing his gut and heart as he counts through the rooster crowing once, twice and the final heart piercing third crow? The world around him stood still as he is aware of nothing else, save the rooster.
Why, Lord, are you showing me this?
My neighbor rooster not stopping at three continued his morning song; the moment of intense spiritual time travel ended. The question plagues me as I write it down before the sights, sounds and smells leave me. It felt so real, in the actual moment yet I know in reality it lasted no longer than a split second. The quiet voices and sounds of a waking community as the backdrop of the intense scene with Peter seemed encompassing and alive to me. Still I ask, Why, Lord, did you show me that?
Was it to remind me that on any given day in a thousand different ways we are capable of betraying Jesus with our actions, words or self-serving hearts? That we Christians today are dangerously close to our own rooster experience when with friends we talk about how un-Christ-like the world is yet stand around the proverbial camp fire doing nothing to change it? Is our comfort zone around that fire with friends the extent of our action to bring about change for Jesus? Does our silence and lack of effort to publicly and actively advocate for Christ any different that Peter’s denial?
If we are to stand before our God on judgment day to account for all we have done or not done and if the weight of my spirit in that glimpse back at that historically significant moment in time Jesus walked the earth was any indication, oh People, we do not want the rooster crowing in the background! Let it be our battle cry rather than announcing our betrayals.
Peter went on to be a mighty force in the early Christian church. Perhaps it took his rooster experience to humble his heart to the state of brokenness necessary for Jesus to rebuild it for His service. I do not know why I had this weighty and puzzling experience this morning but I know it was for God’s purposes. I may never know the answer while I’m still on this side of heaven but it got my attention in a profound way. Roosters crow to usher in the new morning and wake the sleeping world…..ponder that a while. Perhaps the rooster played a bigger part in the story than we see at first glance.
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